Golden Globes 2012

After watching a less than entertaining, more predictable than usual Golden Globes last night, I only have one thing to say...

In which I rant about Les Miserables (and die a little inside)

Every so often a film casts someone so unbearably wrong for a role that it literally keeps me up at night. And guess what? It’s (possibly) happened again. I’m still holding my breath for someone to admit that this is just some bad internet rumor and NOT TRUE, but in this day and age of Hollywood, I’m pretty sure it’s really happening. AND IT KILLS ME!!!

WARNING: This is going to get rant-y and there will most likely be strong language involved.

So, you guys! I admit it. I’m a total musical theater nerd! Like, for reals. Like, I can sing Into the Woods word for word. Every part. (See also: Sweeny Todd, Westside Story, Sunset Boulevard, The Fantasticks, Pippin, JC Superstar, Miss Saigon, and many, many, many more.) So when they announced that there would be a movie version of Les Miserables, I jumped up and down and screamed and immediately started making mental notes of who would be my dream cast.

I’d like to take this time to break down my feelings for the real casting. Role by role. (See? This is how passionate I am about these things!)

Jean ValJean: Hugh Jackman – I approve wholeheartedly.

Javert: Russel Crow – ehhh, I’m a little concerned about his singing voice in this role, but acting wise, he’s spot on. (Please don’t let him do to this role what Helena Bonham Carter did to Sweeny Todd!)

Fantine: Anne Hathaway – She can sing it. She can act it. However, she’s a little contemporary for me for this. But ultimately, I approve.

The Thenardiers: Helena Bonham Carter and Sacha Baron Cohen – LOVE IT! Even though HBC can’t sing, this role does not require the singing talent that Sweeney Todd did. (I read somewhere a while back that Mr. Thenardiers was going to be Geoffrey Rush and as much as I love Sasha Baron Cohen, I like Geoffrey Rush for this even more. Oh well. SBC will be great.)

Marius: Eddie Redmayne – oooh. I’m intrigued. He’s perfect, now here’s hoping he can sing it. And THANK GOD it isn’t that freaking Jonas brother who fucked up the awesome 25^th anniversary PBS thing! Whew!

Cosette: Amanda Seyfried – I called that day one. She’ll be good. I do kind of wish they would’ve gone with a somewhat unknown Broadway gal for this though.

Eponine: TAYLOR SWIFT!?! – Are you guys on CRACK? Did you SEE Valentine’s day?

Look, I actually like Taylor Swift. I think she’s gorgeous, and funny, and an AMAZING songwriter, and a good country singer (when properly produced, not live. Remember the Grammys when she sang with Stevie Nicks? Oy.) But just because someone can sing, it doesn’t mean they can sing everything. Taylor Swift is not a Broadway belter. She’s a whispery country girl. UGH! I can’t even…

And then there’s the acting thing. Apart from the fact that the girl is one of the worst actors I’ve ever seen in my life – she’s so bad Taylor Lautner looked like Robert De Niro next to her in Valentine’s Day – she couldn’t be more wrong for the part. 

Say what you will about Lea Michele, but at least she would have sung the shit out of that role.

click here for proof!!!

Anyway, I will probably go see this movie because, well, it’s LES MIS! But I am not happy about TAYLOR FUCKING SWIFT. If I were Nina Gold, I’d ask that my credit read: Casting by Nina Gold (except for Taylor Swift. That was Tom Hooper and Universal trying to get young people to come see the film. I completely understand that she is wrong for the part and cannot act her way out of a paper bag.)

Where’s Kanye when you really need him?

Sorry for the rant but I’m very passionate about my musicals. Thanks for bearing with me and I hope everyone had happy and safe holidays.

OMG casting moments - part 2

I think it’s time for another OMG casting moment -- well this really qualifies as moments, but it’s for the same role so I guess I can lump them together. These are still a little embarrassing for me. I hope you thoroughly enjoy my humiliation.

I did this little indie film where a major role was a transsexual prostitute. The director really wanted to find an authentic transgender actor. This is harder than you might think. Especially for a very emotionally demanding scene opposite an Academy Award winning actor.

During this project I saw more male genitalia squished into pantyhose than I ever imagined I would see in my lifetime. (I'm not quite sure why they all felt the need to hike their skirts way up and sit with their legs apart.) One lovely lady, wearing a fishnet top (sans bra), even placed my hand on her surgically enhanced breast so I could feel how real it felt. I only remember how much I wish the mesh covered a little more and how surprisingly soft her skin was through the holes. But the strangest encounter on this project was when an actor explained how to “tuck your junk” with a full-on demonstration using duct tape. Some things cannot be unseen.

And on that note, have a wonderful holiday season everyone! I’ll be back in the New Year.

Hot People Pep Talk. (I know, but bear with me. Even hot people have insecurities.)

Dear, good-looking actors: Being attractive is not an affliction.  Some actors seem to think that if they play the hot love interest they’re selling out. (I’m looking at you Johnny Depp!) I’ve had this conversation with too many actors recently to let it slide any longer.

The conversation goes something like this…

HOT ACTOR: The nerdy virgin character is so much more interesting. I want to read for that role.

CASTING DIRECTOR: *laughs because she thinks he’s kidding*

HOT ACTOR: I can be nerdy. I swear!

CD: You really can't.

HOT ACTOR: But I’m an ACTOR. Please let me try.

CD: *gives in*

So HOT ACTOR comes in and auditions for the nerd, his biceps bulging under his short-sleeved button down shirt, his hair sans product for the first time in months, thick-framed glasses attempting to cover up his bedroom eyes, but guess what? HOT ACTOR is still HOT. Plus HOT ACTOR hasn’t been a virgin for so long he doesn’t even remember what that feels like, and we can tell. Because wardrobe and hair and glasses aside, he’s got that inner confidence that hot people seem to be born with. And this is not a bad thing. There are MANY roles; some would even argue that there are MORE roles for hot people than there are for character actors (that is, of course, when Johnny Depp isn’t playing all of them). So embrace your hotness. If we didn’t have a hot love interest to pine after, what would all the millions of teenage girls do? Think about the teenagers, guys. The teenagers.

You're Not Fooling Anyone

I'm in a bit of a rant-y mood today, so bear with me. 

Look, don’t lie in your audition! You will most likely get caught. If we specify that we want an actual French person with an authentic accent, we mean it. Don’t come in and tell us you’re from France when you’re clearly from Paolo Alto. When we're reading people with actual French accents, that are actually from France, and then you come in sounding like a cartoon, we kind of hate you for it.

An even more extreme version of this happened when I was casting the roll of a transgender prostitute for a film. We clearly stated that we did not want to see any women that were born women for this role. We had an open call - always interesting - and a few women that were clearly born women, tried to pass off that they were transgender. They weren't fooling anyone. And we were annoyed that they wasted our time.

LESSON: Honesty is the best policy. (most of the time)

Happy Halloween

Headshots: What not to do. Another lesson from Tobias. (click here!)

Please save the costumes for Halloween.

It’s All About Me

Sometimes you come into a casting room and the producer/director/casting director’s attention is not entirely on you. Please remember not to take it personally! You never know what might be going on in the producer/director/casting director’s head. They might be having personal problems or production problems that have absolutely nothing to do with you. All you can control is how you handle the situation.

You can choose to be angry at that person for not giving you their attention, or you can make light of it and try to win them back. It is your time to shine!

There’s a delicate way of getting the focus back on you without being obnoxious and I’m not sure I will entirely be able to explain this here.

Let me try with examples:

After our session gets backed up for reasons beyond our control, Actor 1 comes in and tries to hide his frustration with silence. The director has to finish checking an email message before getting down to business. I try making idle chitchat but Actor 1 is having none of it. He answers my questions with short one-word answers then when we finally do the scene his anger shows through.

Actor 2 comes in and makes a crack about the nice long nap he was able to fit in while we made him wait so long. He tells us he was having a great time watching the different personalities melt down in the waiting room from the wait. The director tells him to hold on one more minute while checking a text and the actor pulls out his phone and says he needs to check a text as well. But all of this is done in a fun way that keeps our attention on him. It’s an art, I tell you.

Now, we remember both of these actors equally but which one do you think we’d rather hire?